“Coming to Tilburg proved to be my best choice in life”

For Michelle, the introduction camp signals the start of her Tilburg student days. “I had just turned eighteen and came to Tilburg from Veenendaal on my own. Friends asked me: “Why on earth would you study in that city?” Utrecht would have been a more logical choice. But on Open Day the campus had given off good vibes; I could picture myself walking there. So Tilburg it was.”

All in good time

Patrick enrolled in Psychology in 1990: “Let’s just say that academically I took my own good time. I was left-wing, red even, and an idealist. I joined the School Council and the University Council, I served on several boards, and I was engaged in local politics. The Berlin Wall had just fallen and it was a time of hope. In my early years as a student I was also on the cooking committee of the introduction camp, and that’s how I met Mirelle.” 

We had a lot of fun together, dancing at Extase to ‘Like the way I do’ and ‘The love shack.’ There was always a palpable but subdued sense of excitement when we were together.

Mirelle Voskes

Dancing at Extase

Even though Mirelle and Patrick meet frequently after the introduction period, it will be nearly five years until they become a couple. Mirelle: “We had a lot of fun together, dancing at Extase to ‘Like the way I do’ and ‘The love shack.’ There was always a palpable but subdued sense of excitement when we were together.”

Long-awaited email

When Patrick’s relationship ends, things get more serious. In 1997 he sends Mirelle an email titled “A long-awaited email.” “That was our thing,” Patrick recalls. “Every time we’d chat, we’d part saying something like ‘Let’s get together sometime, we’ll be in touch.’ That one mail was the first of many.” 

Mirelle sings in the student choir and invites Patrick to a performance in the Tilburg Concert Hall. That events set the stage for a turning point in their relationship. “He walked me home afterwards and we kissed for the first time. I was seeing someone from outside Tilburg at the time, so after we’d kissed I thought ‘Okay, that just happened. No big deal.’ But the next morning I saw Patrick on campus; me and my friends Monique and Sonja were studying there and he sort of stuck his head around the corner. ‘Oh heck,’ I remember thinking when I saw him. ‘This was more than just a kiss.’” 

We got to know the Warande park quite well – like many other students in love by the way

A small bench in the Warande park 

In the weeks that follow Patrick and Mirelle see a lot of each other. “We got to know the Warande park quite well – like many other students in love by the way.” The couple spend a lot of time sitting on the small bench by the pond. No other places on campus retain memories for them. “P and S Buildings have been knocked down, sadly. It’s still weird that there’s a gap where they once stood,” Mirelle says.

Flowers

Even as her friends are trying to talk some sense into her (she does, after all, still have a boyfriend), Mirelle keeps seeing Patrick. And he wins her heart. By sending her a large bouquet of flowers for her birthday, for example. “My parents came to Tilburg that day, and those flowers simply could not be ignored or pushed out of sight, so I told them I’d been given them by a good friend but that I wasn’t in love yet.” But not much later she was, so deeply in fact that she broke up with her boyfriend and when soon after the fresh couple visit Den Bosch, the day of that visit marks the symbolic start of their romantic relationship. 

History repeats itself when daughter Floor, now a student of International Sociology at Tilburg University, and her boyfriend sit on the small bench by the pond in the Warande park

Friends of Cobbenhagen

After they graduate, the couple stay in Tilburg. In 2001 they buy a house and trade student life for family life when in 2003 and 2006 respectively their daughters Floor and Liselot are born. And history repeats itself when Floor, now a student of International Sociology at Tilburg University, and her boyfriend sit on the small bench by the pond in the Warande park. 

His proudest achievement

Patrick and Mirelle remain connected to the university: they are members of Tilburg University’s alumni association, Friends of Cobbenhagen, and ambassadors to the university. They also both work in fields related to their studies. Patrick majored in Work and Organizational Psychology, a field that is highly relevant to his work. “I’m a director at Het Pon & Telos, a research and consultancy firm in Tilburg that is also a partner of Tilburg University. I visit the university most weeks and I know many people there, ranging all the way from security staff to members of the Executive Board.” In 2011, he obtained a doctorate. “It was a good opportunity to explore a subject outside work that has always interested me: participation and how it is organized. I didn’t do it for the degree though; my proudest achievements are to be a son, a father, and a husband.”

Learning as her central theme

Mirelle opted for Developmental and Educational Psychology. “That’s where I was captured by the psychology of learning and it’s fascinated me ever since. I developed learning environments for Dutch Railways, worked in primary education for a while, was an independent education consultant, and taught at a university of applied sciences. I am currently working as an educational adviser at the Elizabeth-TweeSteden Hospital in Tilburg where together with medical specialists I am responsible for ensuring the quality of training for residents.”

No-brainer

Looking back on their careers and lives, they are happy with the choices they have made. Mirelle: “It was the university that brought us together, but the city itself plays a significant role in our lives, too. We are active citizens and neighbors because we feel strongly connected to the place that is home to us. We see former classmates quite often, and my uni friends Monique and Sonja partied the hardest at our wedding.” The key question is of course whether getting together was the right choice for them. The verdict is as swift as it is unanimous: “No question about it. We belong together.”

Date of publication: 13 September 2023